Me: So you like SS3?

(Silence...)

Me: That place very good?

She: You know ah, that Indonesian maid steal my towel.

Me: (No longer attempting to hold a conversation) Ah, ya. Really? Why?

She: Last time I come ah, all my towel, all got so much, now only so little left.

Me: Tsk. tsk. Really, so bad!

She:And then ah, got mouse ah... STARE at me when I sleeping, then ah, very clever you know!

Me: (I feel this is where I should offer a comment)
        Oh, Wah.

She: And then, he see me open my eyes, it run away ah!

Me: Wah, so clever

She: Yah, you know ah, at night I go toilet-

Me: Oh, wah (I think I'm simply slotting expressions now)

She: Then ah, got something POOSH me ah! Then I fall down! The devil poosh me one!

Me: Hmmm... Wah...

She: Yea, and ah-

Caretaker returned.

Ah... help at last! I abandoned the old lady while she was distractedly playing with her arm and flew to introduce ourselves. Oh, before this, I caught another delightdful old lady to talk to.

Me: Hi!

She: (Ignores me)

Me: HULLO!

She: (Garbled something in cantonese)

Me: Oh Rachel... come translate

And in bounced Rachel.

Me: Hi Aunty, wat's your name?

She: *cantonese stuff*

Rachel: She asked if you moved house.

Me: (Errr... no, I didn't and if I did, and she knows... well....) No, Aunty

She: *summore cantonese*

Rachel: She asked if you moved to nearby.

Me: (When will I ever learn?) Yes aunty.

She: *more cantonese* (I think she's actually muttering profanity)

Rachel: She asked you why you never tell her you moved.

(How should I know? It's not often that I announce imaginary house moving to random old folks' homes)

Me: Err... I forgot?

As I was standing aroung talking to the caretaker, another old lady limped out from her room. I made way for her as I went "old-lady-hopping" (which consisted of talking, or attempting to talk, to old ladies). I went up to another old lady on a chair, Aunty Eva. She is very sane, and would have been delightful to talk to, if she could hear. As I was asking the caretaker about her, the caretaker turned to her

Caretaker: WOI, AUNTY EVA!

Aunty Eva: Ya?

Caretaker: WOI, VALERIE WAS TALKING TO YOU!

Me: No, I wa-

Caretaker: SHE WAS TALKING TO YOU AND YOU IGNORED HER!

Aunty Eva: Oh, er, sorry ah...

Me: But I wasn't talking to her.

Caretaker: I know.

I think it's a conspiracy to turn them into a circus. After watching first-hand, the process of dementing old ladies, I hopped to the next lady, the one who hobbled in just now, Aunty Marie.

Hehe... To be continued...